Just a drink, a martini, shaken not stirred

Riding off into the sunset on a speed boat with mountains of limestone jetting out of the water, it all felt very James Bond. Was I on my way to check in at a new beach resort, or was I unknowingly being transported to a meeting with Dr. No? Arriving at Rayavadee, the Cambodian method of wading through shallow waters was unacceptable for a guest like me. Instead, because the boat couldn’t reach the resort pier at low tide, they brought a dock out to me by tractor. It was all rather peculiar, but I loved it. Two guest services personnel were waiting on the dock to welcome me, and back on the beach, the guest services manager had my check-in documents ready. I was escorted to a beautiful open-air waiting room where they brought me a fresh coconut milk and lime welcome drink, and I signed the registration papers.

I was eligible for an upgrade, but they suggested I take a look at both bungalows first. The higher category room had a private “hydropool” in the garden but was located further from the beaches and main pool. The lower category room they had prepared for me, however, was directly beside the main pool with a view of Railay beach, and the interior was identical to the other bungalow. I opted for the room with a sea view that already had a chilled bottle of Prosecco waiting for me. The bungalow was fantastic, full of mahogany and all the creature comforts one could desire. My favorite part of my orientation tour, however, was when the young lady escorting me around the resort pointed out that the closet was double sided with one door on the bedroom side and one door in the bathroom. “If you need the restroom quickly, fastest way through the closet.” I spent the first evening in the room giggling childishly at how wonderful this place was (and imagining myself rushing through the closet to the toilet). I popped open the bottle of Prosecco, ordered some room service and made myself at home.

The next morning, I enjoyed breakfast at the main restaurant and then walked around the resort taking some photos. I spent a few hours swimming and enjoying a perfectly sunny day. I walked to all three beaches on this 26 acre property and had some excellent French fries in the Grotto bar inside a cave at Phranang beach. I wanted at least one perfect day of beach relaxation on this trip, and I lucked out and got it. It was, afterall, monsoon season, and showers could have put a damper on my beach time at any moment, but the sun was shining all day.

Should I take the M1 to the M2 down to 342, or stay on the service road all the way to Railay beach? It may sound like trying to figure out which highway to take to get somewhere, but this is what was going through my head while trying to find my way back to my bungalow late in the evening after a great dinner of steamed sea bass with ginger, chilies and lime at the Krua Phranang Thai restaurant on the opposite end of the property. The paths around the property were quite narrow, full of vegetation and not incredibly well-lit. the exception was the service road, which was wide enough for golf carts to pass by and had plenty of lighting. The real question is which way I was least likely to be attacked by wild animals. Against my better judgment, I decided to take the smaller, shorter path to my room. Sure enough, while walking quickly down the path trying to ignore the unidentifiable sounds of the night, rustling in the bushes and splashes in the ponds, a medium-sized gray monkey jumped straight in front of me on the path and looked me in the eyes. I glared right back at him, he let out a yelp and bolted faster than he came. I guess I’m one scary monkey.

Some more breakfast and some more swimming in the morning before I had to bid farewell to my short-term home at Rayavadee. The staff encouraged me to come back and spend more time soon, and I agreed to try my hardest. Back on the speedboat tilted up at full speed towards the mainland, my Bond-like adventure was over.

No More Virgins in Chiang Mai

“Passenger Stephen George please come to the service counter.” I thought maybe the announcement had something to do with making sure my luggage was transferred from my Dubai flight to my connecting flight from Bangkok to Chiang Mai, but the news was a little less mundane. The Thai Airways staff had received a message at the gate requesting that they notify me that my flight from Chiang Mai to Luang Prabang in 4 days had been cancelled. I think the gate staffed were pleasantly surprised and somewhat relieved at how well I took the news. I took the phone number for Lao Airlines in Chiang Mai and thanked them for letting me know. Why should I get upset? I’m on vacation.

I made it to Chiang Mai where I was met by a compact, energy-filled, young lady who was to be my tour guide for the next couple days. For those of you that have met my friend Uzma (Hi Uzma!), Gina is the Thai version. Her smile and her bubbly personality were contagious, and I think I spent most of my time with her laughing. Having not slept much since I left Doha, I was a little tired and chose to take a long nap at the hotel when we arrived. Gina returned in the evening to take me to a local khantoke dance performance and dinner.

I had a very large and enjoyable dinner of chicken soup, yellow curry with pork, crispy noodles with tamarind, fried chicken with herbs, fried bananas, chili paste with tomatoes, chili paste with eggplant, sticky rice, steamed rice, fresh cucumbers and long beans, stir-fried mixed vegetables, and fresh fruit with sweet rice cakes for dessert. Gina thought it would be best that I sit on the floor to have a real local experience, and once I saw the “tables”, I completely agreed with her decision. The tables still didn’t have seats, they just brought you and the food a bit higher. By the time the dance performance was starting though, my right leg had gone completely numb. I was trying so hard to follow local etiquette and keep my feet behind me to prevent pointing the soles of my feet at someone (a sign of disrespect in Thailand), but I was beginning to worry that my leg might fall off from lack of circulation. I managed to maneuver into a more comfortable position without offending anyone. On the way back to the hotel, Gina mentioned that she hoped it would not rain in the morning. She explained a local ritual to prevent rain that involves having a virgin place an upside down stalk of lemongrass into the ground. "Problem is, impossible to find virgin now!"

The next day, Gina and I, despite a little rain, went up to Doi Suthep, a local mountain crowned by an important Buddhist temple. The mountain is called Elephant mountain because the legend says that an elephant carried the remains of the King to the top of the mountain and then died itself. “Do you know why the elephant died?” Gina asked. “Try walking up the mountain and you’ll know,” she answered for me.

At the temple, I learned to always walk clockwise around the temples and how to pay respect to Buddha in the Thai style. When visiting the mountain, it is said you are allowed to make one wish, so I followed the tradition and wished away. There is also a very interesting tradition involving asking an elephant figurine any questions you might have. You first ask the elephant your question and then try to lift the figurine with your pinky (for men, ring finger for women). Then, you repeat your question, but ask the figurine to become heavier or lighter if the answer is yes. I tried it, and I liked my answer.

The day continued with visits to a Jade workshop, teak carving factory, silk weaving factory and a few more temples. When the tour ended, Gina asked if I would like to join her for the special Sunday “Walking Street”, a local market where they close down some of the main streets in town to allow vendors to set up their goods for sale. Together, we wandered around town a bit looking at all the cheap goods on offer. We stopped at a street stand to try some of the local noodles, which were fantastic; spicy and sweet, full of flavor, and right up my alley. After our spicy dinner, we grabbed some black jelly, a strange herbal gelatin made from the root of a Chinese herb that supposedly helps lower cholesterol. The jelly is shaved off a giant jiggling mass, placed in a bowl of crushed ice and topped with palm sugar. It was a perfect dessert.

Gina didn’t accompany me on Monday. Instead, I took an all day Thai cooking class. We went to the market in the morning and then prepared six different Thai dishes during the day, eating each one after we were done cooking that particular course. It was a fun class, and Thai food is a lot less complicated than I thought. During my first day in Chiang Mai, I had visited a tailor to have some new suits made for school since many events require formal business attire, so after the cooking class, I stopped by for my final fitting before they pack up the suits and ship them home. You have to love a place where you can get three bespoke suits made in two days and it costs the same as one suit at home. I polished off the day with a walk through the night market where I bought some tasteless t-shirts for gifts.

This morning, I packed up and went with Gina to the airport where we said our goodbyes. Boarding my Lao Airlines flight to Luang Prabang, I wasn’t the only one that found it amusing that we were flying a small Chinese-built propeller plane. Several of the young Western travelers whipped out their cameras and started posing in front of the plane. I had to practically fold myself in half to fit through the door of the plane, and I kept hitting my head on the overhead compartment doors that were a little less than overhead for me. At one point during the flight, people sitting towards the front started turning around with a look that screamed, “What’s that smell?” The smell was our inflight meal being passed out by the stewardess starting from the back. Despite the smell, I chomped right into the pork meatball sandwich. It wasn’t the best meal of my life, but it didn’t kill me.

There’s something delightfully old-fashioned about sleeping in a four-poster bed surrounded by a mosquito net blowing gently under the breeze of a ceiling fan (ok, so I have an AC unit too). I’m laying here getting ready to call it an early night here in Luang Prabang, and I have a very pleasant first impression of this town. The French colonists left their mark on this small town full of colonial era buildings, bakeries and coffee shops, yet the town has a distinctly Lao flair to it. I wandered up and down the main street of town this evening and visited the night market. The people here seem friendly and easy-going, and I think I’m falling in love with the overall atmosphere. It’s hot and sticky outside, but somehow that adds to the experience. I had dinner at a traditional Lao restaurant recommended by my guide here, and I’m not entirely sure what I ate, but I enjoyed it. I started with some fresh spring rolls and then moved on to a Luang Prabang Pork Casserole (really more of a hot pot type dish) with sticky rice. The spring rolls were very familiar, but I’m not sure I want to know which parts of the pig were in my pork casserole. There was a lot of indistinguishable gray and white minced meat, some of which I think were different organs, but even with my highest suspicions, not knowing for sure meant I was able to eat and enjoy. Tomorrow, I have an early start to my Lao adventure, so I’m off to eat my goodnight cream puff (Vive la France!) and drift off to sleep under my mosquito net.

A beautiful day in Chiang Mai

Squat and wish - guess Jessica is good for something!

Gina and I at the Yaang Come Village Hotel

My room at the Hotel Les 3 Nagas in Luang Prabang, Laos